034: Jamie & Jacklyn Purvis – Stepping Into Who You Want To Be: The Be Do Have Movement

Jonathan DeYoe: Hi there. Welcome back. On this episode of the Mindful Money podcast, I’m chatting with Jamie and Jacklyn Purvis. Jamie and Jacklyn are the father daughter founders of the Be do have movement, a high performance coaching company. They help people get unstuck to build bigger businesses and better lives. It’s their mission to empower people to be the best they can be and have the courage to follow their dreams and live their best lives. Jamie, Jacklyn welcome to the Mindful Money podcast.

Jacklyn: Thanks for having us. We’re excited to be here today.

Jonathan DeYoe: I’m excited to have you and have this conversation. So, first we do this. Start off with some simple, some easy answer things. Where do you each call home, and where are you connecting from now?

Jacklyn: I am, um, now connecting from San Diego, California. So I’ve lived here for about two years, moved here when I got married. My husband’s american, so made that move over. And I’m initially from Toronto, Canada, where Jamie is situated, where we’ve been situated our entire lives. So definitely canadian team based?

Jamie: Yeah, I’m in Toronto and born and raised here, and I love San Diego.

Jonathan DeYoe: There’s sun year round. So you were both born and raised in Toronto. Okay, I’m going to ask this question to Jacklyn because your dad is here. I think this is going to be a fun one to answer. What did you learn about money and entrepreneurship growing up? No help from dad.

Jacklyn: We’ve worked through some of these things now. I definitely learned to save, but in a way, a little bit initially was out of fear, so it took a lot for me to build up into. Okay, you want to invest your money to also make money and understand that that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. So I got into the habit of spend for short term means of joy, and then also feeling like I need to squirrel everything and save everything away.

Jonathan DeYoe: It’s a good lesson, right? It’s a good lesson to save, but not out of fear. That’s good. Jamie, how about you?

Jamie: I had no money lessons from my parents. What I grew up with was a scarcity mindset. It was middle class family. I didn’t go for not having anything, but at the same time, it always seemed like there was more month than money. So I heard the conversations, know there’s not enough money. Money doesn’t grow on trees. Stuff, uh, that was embedded into my thinking. So I know I passed, uh, on some of that through Jacklyn just in normal conversation. I did start to learn and develop and realize and get into that abundant mindset and value money and the giving of money and setting up different accounts to allow cash flow budgeting, and it changed my life. When I really took control and responsibility for it, I always made a lot of money, and it just sort of went through my hands, and I had to learn to make sure that I saved some money for me.

Jonathan DeYoe: I’m curious about how old you were when you saw the need for that transition, and then sort of, by extension, Jacklyn how old you were when he saw the need for that transition, so that some of that lesson might have came through there. This is a unique opportunity to have this from a multi generation standpoint.

Jamie: Yeah, I went through bankruptcy, lost everything, made millions, lost seven houses, went through a total bankruptcy. Understood. At that point, I had to start to make some changes. And that’s, uh, when I started to really realize that I needed to save money out of every paycheck for me before I paid everything else. I would always pay everything else and then save what was left. So there was never anything left. So when I reversed engineered that for me is when I started to see that opportunity. It would have been in my mid to late 30s before I really took control of my finances. And losing seven houses and renting for seven years, it was a blessing. And in hindsight, it was a blessing. At the time, it was hell. And not having and blame and everything else, I took all that, never took any personal responsibility early on for it. And then once I took responsibility and realized I had to really start to move this plan forward is when I started the process and when I really saw the big changes, when I made a decision to stop drinking eight years ago. So this is going on later. I was 50 at that point. And I’d started and we had started to accumulate again. But when I stopped drinking is when clarity came and I really started to realize that, okay, I needed to take full responsibility and get really clear. And that’s when my life really, the abundance that shifted after that was incredible.

Jonathan DeYoe: Wow. Thank you for bringing up, it seems, od in this podcast setting to talk about alcohol, but thank you for bringing that, uh, up, because I think that is my current struggle. Like, I have a men’s group that I’m part of, and we’re trying to work through Jonathan’s issues with alcohol, not because I’m drunk every night or anything like that, but know it takes the edge off. And so when it takes the edge off, it’s easy to do, but it also comes with other baggage. So to recognize that in this context, I really, really appreciate that. Uh, so, Jacklyn when did you see this transition? Or what did you experience with your dad going through some of these transitions himself?

Jacklyn: I will say that them going through time, it wasn’t something I was aware of. I felt like we had everything we needed. I think you guys sheltered it from us a little bit. I didn’t know at that time that you were going through everything you were going through also, I was born into it a little bit at that point, but I never really experienced, I would say on my end. My experience from that was definitely up until my 20s when I started saving and budgeting and just started to become aware of what that meant. It was just never something I was really concerned with before that. And then it was around 25 27 when I had done one of our leadership programs. That really helps you go into, what are the beliefs I have that are potentially blocking me and holding me back. And that’s when I really started to notice I have a huge fear about putting money into investments. So that holds you back in a way, like, yes, savings, good to a point, but that’s only going to get you so far. So I really started to look at the limitations I held around that, and I think that came from a little bit just what Jamie and my mom went through at that point and how they got to that position. So, yeah, that’s the point when I started to realize, okay, I need to start looking at this differently.

Jonathan DeYoe: So do you actually call him?

Jacklyn: Yes.

Jonathan DeYoe: You do? Okay. Yeah.

Jamie: Good pickup. It’s interesting you picked that up, because this is our business. This is our personal and business relationship, and it’s never been dad since we started this business. It’s never dad, it’s Jamie. And I think that, uh, levels the playing field for me, and I wouldn’t expect anything else. And, yeah, good pickup.

Jonathan DeYoe: I have an 18 year old, and he called me Jonathan. And I was like, no, I’m not Jonathan to you.

Jamie: It took being in business together. So the last three years.

Jonathan DeYoe: Seems reasonable. So we’ve talked about money. Uh, you had a bunch of houses, you went through bankruptcy. What about entrepreneurship? Were you building something? And then sort of the flip side of that. Jacklyn where did you learn about entrepreneurship?

Jamie: For me, I’ve been self employed my whole life. I started my career in real estate and, uh, as a real estate agent who just became very successful, very driven, deep rooted scarcity beliefs. That’s why I think what drove me so much and accumulate and because I made so much money, it was always there and available. So then we started to buy and invest, then we started to build, and then we over leveraged, and then the market crashed in 1989, and that’s when I lost everything. So, yeah, that was the experience there. It was just making a lot of money. I’ve always had the entrepreneur spirit, and then when I lost it all, I licked my wounds for about six months, and then just, what do I do now? Right? I just got back on the horse, and here we go again. Very cautious. My wife was very cautious at that point. I think my biggest regret is what I put her through, what I put her through by just presenting things and just expecting her to move along with me. And we are still together. Uh, biggest benefit in life. I always say I married the last saint out of heaven because of everything we’ve been through, and we’re still together after all that. And it made us stronger over time. But I’ve always been self employed, and.

Jonathan DeYoe: You get to build back better, right?

Jamie: That’s the 100%, yeah.

Jacklyn: Jacklyn it’s just interesting when Jimmy’s sharing that, uh, too, because you can see in that response how much stuff around money can really still come up to this day. And that was how many years ago, right? Yeah, just interesting there. Preneurship wise. I was surrounded by a second part my entire life, so grew up with it. For my parents, my grandparents, it was just all around me. So I think when I went into the corporate space, I come from an advertising background. I did that for a few years, was great experience, didn’t love it, uh, definitely wasn’t the space I was looking for. I think, in my heart I always knew working on my own and creating something on my own was what I wanted. I saw a lot of more purpose and joy coming out of that space, and I just didn’t know at the time, coming out of school, what that could be. So I’m really grateful that it’s all worked out with Jamie and we are where we are now. But, yeah, it was definitely something I.

Jonathan DeYoe: Was around growing up, so take me through the process. Wherever you both were at the time, how was b do have born? Where did that come out of? Did one of you say, hey, we’ve got to do this, or did one of you launch it and then say, hey, you should come do this with me? How did it come about?

Jamie: Started in March 2018. I was leading a real estate company. We built a great real estate company, number one in Canada. Loved what I was doing, and then one day, until I didn’t love what I was doing. I came home one day, and I’d lost that loving feeling. I wasn’t passionate anymore. Everything I’ve ever done in my life, I’m all in. And I started to become aware. The passion was gone, and I knew I always wanted to coach. I was coaching real estate agents, other people in different industries were reaching out, and I knew that was going to be my journey, and I decided to walk away from everything. 2018 left a great role, great income, great bonuses, owner in four companies. I sold all my shares, needed space for me, and took six months off to think and just to be and really get clear on, listen to myself and what did I want at this point in my life. And in that process, Jacklyn and, uh, I, she was helping me thinking about, okay, we’re building out this brand, and the idea was this b two half method that we created came through a lot of training and development that I been through in my life and was coaching real estate agents on. So as I was helping her and a program we were in, and she was helping me. I remember one day just looking at her and really seeing her not as my daughter, but as this young, strong, powerful woman. And I came home or said to my wife, rather that night that I got to talk to her about doing this together and wasn’t planned. It’s been the biggest gift that I’ve experienced in the last three years and didn’t see it, didn’t even think of it until all of a sudden there is in front of me, and I couldn’t let the opportunity slip by and presented. Asked her the next day, and she said, ironically, I’ve been thinking about this, too.

Jonathan DeYoe: She was ahead of you on that, which is just like a woman, always ahead.

Jamie: We’re always trying to catch up Jonathan, always ahead.

Jonathan DeYoe: I’m curious. You said that there was a day when you just didn’t feel the passion. Was there a triggering event, or was it just.

Jamie: No. I knew I was stepping away in 2020 in the role that I was in. I given everybody notice I was stepping away in 2020. I left, uh, a year earlier because I couldn’t stay in a role that I wasn’t happy with. And the hardest thing I had to do in my life was work. Those last from May to December, knowing I was leaving, and I just. Every day was so hard to go to work, and I just fought through it because I didn’t want to leave the company in a place that they didn’t have anybody. And I was part owner of the company, so I needed to make sure we brought the right person on, and I was able to transition them and train them the best of my ability, so that when I could walk away, I had a clean heart, knowing that I’ve done everything I could to transition and pass the baton.

Jonathan DeYoe: So I want to say that I love this idea of a father daughter coaching team, specifically coaching, because I’m betting that the gender differentiation and the age differentiation sort of has to be powerful when you’re facing clients. An older guy has a certain set of needs and desires, but a younger woman has a different set of needs when it comes to that conversation around their business, around their lives. So I have a couple of questions. How does it work? Do you both do the same thing, or is one of you more biz dev and the other is more operations? How does actually operating and running the business work with the two of you?

Jacklyn: So, when we first started out, my background coming into this was from that advertising space, so I was using those skills and still just supporting for a while, and then got to a point when I also did separate certifications. A huge part of what we do as well for our own personal lives is self development on ourselves. That’s constantly something we’re living with. So I got to a point where I was also doing coaching certifications, and then, like, you just shared there, realizing that now there’s an opportunity for me to be supporting people in my age group, because it is different. It’s very different and just different stages of life, and I can easily help someone that was where I was five years ago, because it’s a lot easier to connect. Jamie, I’m curious what you think on that, but I certainly find that, too, with some of Jamie’s clients. Right. Like, just different life stages. So now it works where it is. Separate from a private coaching standpoint. So I’m supporting women specifically around my age group. Jamie’s is a little bit more broad, but definitely more on the business end. And then we do have a few memberships and programs where we can co coach on those. So you get the opportunity of both sides a little bit, but that’s how it’s broken down.

Jonathan DeYoe: Something that strikes me is mean. When you’re coaching somebody, you’re coaching people through their own foibles and their issues. Right. But if you’re coaching a business person, often know, how do you grow a company? Right. And it gets to be specific. And so the customer question might come up, and so do you rely on each other to be the, I mean, Jamie, you’re talking to a gentleman who owns a contracting business, may want to serve a female consumer. So do you bring Jacklyn in to say, what does this messaging sound like? Or those kinds of things? Do you do a lot of cross work?

Jamie: We haven’t to this point. What we’ve been doing up until this point is I have been more aligned with business owners, salespeople, entrepreneurs in the business space. They tend to come for business, and we end up working on this personally, it’s all mindset, right. We come for the business, but when we grow and shift our mindset and beliefs, the business grows, so they tend to come for that. And I’m very comfortable talking about business growth in numbers. And where Jacqueline’s really been helping and bringing so much value is having the experience and being able to help people release things that they hold on to. And I noticed that the age, in my mind, anyway, isn’t an issue for people when they know you can help them. They are not concerned about the age at all. And I’ve been watching Jacklyn evolve through this. She was helping me, like she mentioned, from a, uh, backend support system, advertising, marketing. And she’s been on our coaching programs and watching her evolve and become this powerful coach. And I think she’s growing into that and has grown into that identity now as well, in the belief. I had a client two days ago share with me that she noticed her journey in the last three years, and she’s awestruck. She goes, you must be so proud as her father. I haven’t even told her that yet.

Jonathan DeYoe: What a great venue to share.

Jamie: You said to be real. I love being real.

Jonathan DeYoe: So what are some of the issues you guys face, Jacklyn when you have a client that’s coming on board, what are the issues you’re trying to help.

Jacklyn: Them overcome with the space that I’m in, a lot of it is just not feeling good enough. I think women, especially in their 20s, feel like they need to have their whole life figured out and sorted through, and it’s like a little bit of BS because it’s impossible to actually know what you’re going to do for the rest of your life. So sometimes it’s just getting clear on, okay, what brings you joy? What do you want to move towards? And then how can you really develop the confidence to step into the thing that you want and create habits that support that?

Jonathan DeYoe: I’m 50. I don’t know what I want to do when I grow up, so I totally understand. In fact, I’m fighting growing up every single day. Uh, so what areas? Maybe it’s, I guess, technical areas. Do you guys do your best work?

Jamie: I like to get into the numbers, so whenever I talk to somebody, doesn’t matter where you are, numbers, business income is a reflection of your beliefs. So I always like to start with the numbers. Most of our clients are already very successful, and they feel there’s something missing. They’re feeling stuck. How come I can’t break through? And then I start with the numbers, and we start to build a vision of future, pace them to build their business to this level. What’s that going to look like? What do they envision it being? And then we reverse engineer it. So we lay out the vision for their life, their business goals. Life gets incorporated into that very quickly because I like to make sure we have business and personal objectives and not overweighted in one. And once we do that, then we have the big vision. Then we can break it down into three metrics. What are the three metrics that you see that are going to help you get there? So it could be marketing, could be client acquisition, could be budgeting, financing, whatever that needs to be. Growth leadership is a big one that always shows up. And then once we have that defined, then we can build out some strategies for each of those. So it’s very independent and very customized based on the individual.

Jonathan DeYoe: What gets measured gets done. Right. So measure. Jacklyn how about you?

Jacklyn: I’m supporting a lot more in career relationships and self development space. So those metrics, I look at metrics. Yes. So where is something that we can track? It is a little bit different from Jamie’s standpoint because you don’t have that. Like, it’s not per se income and increase in number of sales calls. However, it is metric based. So what kind of routines are you doing? How accountable are you being to these actions. So it’s just tracked more on an action base versus that specific number.

Jonathan DeYoe: So this is a question for both of you. What are the metrics that you see the most? And I asked this because, Jamie, it sounds like growth is important and you work with business people. I’m just wondering if there’s business people that come to you and say, listen, I make enough money. In fact, I don’t need to make as much money as I make. What I want is ten more hours a week to spend on golf or staring at a wall or whatever.

Jamie: It’s so interesting you say that, because that seems to be my conversations right now with a lot of people that are really successful, that are sitting there saying, now what? And I think one of the I love doing this is helping people get clarity, because if they can’t do it on their own, or they would have done it, so now they’re lost and they’re looking for support and help. So in our conversations, we can help you get clarity. And I just asked some really thought provoking questions that help them think. And I believe everybody’s a leader, so if I can help them a lead themselves to what’s next and to really get in tune with their intuition. Sometimes we’re so stuck in our conscious thinking and analytical minds that we’re not living in the feeling. And the feeling will guide us. We know what’s right, but are we following the feeling? And if we aren’t even aware of the feeling, then there lies an opportunity where we can now take a step back and just start to think and just start to imagine. Be like a kid. Like, what do you want? If anything was possible, if time and money weren’t an option, what would you do? What’s your passion? What do you love doing? What do you have fun at? What would you do for free? And helping people start to envision and just get back into that child.

Jonathan DeYoe: Jacklyn do you want to add anything to that?

Jacklyn: It’s just funny that you asked that question, really, because I see that with a lot of what Jamie shares is up until a certain point, everyone’s obsessed with income, and then once they’re there, it’s no longer the thing. So it is really interesting how that shows up. And I think from my end, just what to actually track. It really comes down to time and consistency. So it’s helping people think bigger about it and then looking at, okay, what does the day to day look like and how do we build that consistency? Make things happen.

Jonathan DeYoe: So I’ve been a consumer of self help and success literature since I was ten years old. So I’ve been reading this stuff for 40 years, right? I’ve read Marcus Aurelius. That’s an Aurelius to zig Ziglar. So from a to z, right. Brown, Carnegie, Conklin, Covey Hill, Johnson, Seneca, Tracy, Trudeau, like all of them. Vaynerchuk, like all of them. I’ve heard people reference the idea of beingness just so many things. But I’ve never run across b do have, strangely. And then since we set this time up, I’ve run across b do have in two other venues, like in the last 30 days. So never in 40 years and three times in 30 days, which I find it’s almost like you’re hitting a nerve of something that’s out there right now. Cultural. So teach us. Tell us what be do have is.

Jacklyn: I’ll open that up and let you. It’s really flipping it. And what we’re taught in school, what I was taught anyways, is the smart goal system, right? You want to know where you want to go, and then you work backwards. Make sure there’s a timeline on that. It’s realistic. And you do all these things and then poof, you become this successful person because you’ve achieved that one thing. And what we’ve really realized is to get to, uh, outcomes faster. It’s about who you’re being in the first place. So it’s picking a direction. Yes. And then focusing on the self image and how you’re showing up and what kind of attitude you have, how you’re communicating with people and really stepping into those characteristics first so that you can then do the habits and the actions that much faster and really get towards that goal and that outcome.

Jamie: And I envision living as if you’ve already achieved your goal today. And to get there, we have to think, right. We have to use our imagination. Like, what would that feel like? And spending thinking time. I was never taught thinking time. I was doing time, but no thinking time. And in the real estate world I was in, the next trainer came in. This is the newest system. This is the newest CRM. This is the newest hot thing. Look at the world today, and everyone’s reading, reading, reading what’s changing. And I learned in my own personal life, I like to lead by example. So when I started to really put myself in a state of mind and imagining if this was the life I wanted, what would it be? And as I got, uh, clear on that, I started to think, well, how would I act? Who would I be? Hanging around with, how would I be spending my time? What books would I be reading? How would I be feeling? Ultimately, I’m going to feel more confident, and this whole process leads you down this path where we can literally close our eyes in five minutes, create this perfect world in our life, in our mind. The more we get clear on that, the more we build on that. And meditation has helped me tremendously. Writing down my goals on a daily basis, not even my goals. Writing down who I am on a daily basis, as if this is who I am, reinforces the belief in me that causes the change which leads to doing things different than I’ve done in the past. So as my thinking grows and my awareness changes, I step and raise my frequency to live at a different level. All of a sudden, you just experienced it, Jonathan. In 30 days, your awareness level was raised, and now you’re seeing it around you, right? The reticular activator has been triggered.

Jonathan DeYoe: Yeah, I thought that might happen.

Jamie: Yeah, well, that’s exactly right.

Jonathan DeYoe: Brain science tells me you know this, right?

Jamie: Why are we taught this? We do it. This is the reality of life. Like, there’s two creations here, first, and then the manifestation in the real world. I wasn’t taught this growing up. I’ve learned it. It’s in all the personal development stories and books. It’s there, but it’s woven. So why not have a principle and, uh, a method that we could teach? And that’s what we’re working on with our clients, to actually have a proven system and it’s trackable, and we’re seeing the successes where people are doubling their businesses, having more free time, learning leadership, and just constantly changing this belief system in ourselves and what we’re capable of doing. So that’s the being part. The doing is actually easy, believe it or not.

Jonathan DeYoe: Yeah. No, I think that it all hinges on that being. It all hinges on that. But I think the uniqueness is you flipped it. Like you said, you flipped it. So what was it that you recognized, you saw in the world that said, hey, this should be flipped and you should put being first? So what was it about your experience? Or was it a trigger? What made you say, all right, let’s put b first?

Jamie: I think for me, it was over the development of my years in training and taking courses and programs, and then just realizing where it happened. I had achieved something, and I didn’t see this process until I started to reflect. And I reflected back, and I remember thinking, it happened when I made the decision. That’s what I wanted. And then I stepped, uh, into this shift, uh, in my mind, and started acting as if. And I remember one of my mentors back at the time when I made that decision, she said to me, be presidential. And I looked at her not having any clue what she was saying. However, being presidential, meaning everybody’s watching. More importantly, you’ve got to treat yourself as if you’re already this person. And that was the first evolution of it for me in my real estate life. And as I transitioned out of this, when we were trying to, I was thinking, what do we name this company? And it was like, do you have movement? We want to create this movement of people that are stepping into living and having the courage to really go after life.

Jonathan DeYoe: I recently saw, and Jacklyn this next question is going to be specifically for you. And this is another unique opportunity because we have different generations here. I recently saw, I don’t remember who said it, but it was a twitter post that talked about how a successful boomer thinks that $70,000 of income is enough. A successful Gen X thinks it’s 85, a successful millennial thinks it’s 110, and a successful Gen Z thinks it’s 170. So it’s very interesting to me that the younger you get, the younger generations think that success comes from a much larger amount of income. And I’m wondering if that is the culture, social media sort of warping it and making the have come before the be and the. Jacklyn I’m wondering if. So you’re kind of a younger generation, what would you speak to, what you experience, what you see in culture that maybe you’re trying to counter with coaching?

Jacklyn: There’s a lot of fear for our generation. Like, we were brought up in a space where it wasn’t as easy to get a property. Like, it was watching my parents do that. Right. It was just a different space. Inflation has gone through the roof, and it’s still very much fear based. So, of course, it’s. I think I need this amount. I mean, Gen Z, that number doesn’t seem too far off, to be honest, just with the reality of what’s going on around us. I do think a big component to that, though, is looking deeper than just having that income. And also, who are you being like, what does success actually mean? So maybe that’s the question to really start thinking about for everybody as much as it’s that income. Um, what else? You’re not just going to have that income and then, poof, be successful. It’s also, how are you showing up every day? What type of person are you being. It’s going to come back to that being piece and that’s something over. Like, I was very lucky. Jamie taught me what that was and how to show up as a person and how to really be a leader in your own life. And it’s something that I practice every single. Like that doesn’t go away. It just becomes a part of growing in the journey.

Jamie: Yeah, it’s interesting. I recruited real estate agents for nine years, and as agents and people were transitioning into real estate, the number everybody wanted to make was $100,000. For anybody transitioning in, I knew that appointment, in my mind, it’s 100. If they were really ambitious, it might go to 150, and then the super ambitious would go to 250. So it was interesting watching people coming in with this six figure mindset and growing up, $100,000 was incredible. Now, also, 30 years ago, 100,000 was more than today. It’s probably half a million today. Right. So the numbers change. What I’m seeing, though, is the younger generation is they’re not willing to accept old paradigms, old thinking. They want to do it their way. And there’s so many more ways now for them that. What’s an influencer? Right? What the heck’s an influencer? And you can create a lifestyle on being an influencer, having a YouTube channel. So the world has just opened up, and I’m seeing this where people really aren’t as concerned about the money. They want more of the lifestyle with the young generation. They don’t want to sacrifice their life for the job. I’m seeing that so evident right now.

Jonathan DeYoe: That’s great. Maybe it’s a boomer thing, maybe it’s a Gen X thing. I don’t know. It’s one of us that created this idea of work. Work. And then you retire, then you have fun. Right? And that was dumb. I don’t know whose idea that was, but I know I bought in. I’m a card carrying member, so I get it. So there’s just a ton of places we could go with this, but I want to make it really simple for listeners. And so what I’d love to do, and, uh, I’d love to have you each do this, but if the second person’s answers are the same as the first, I’m going to cut it off and never air this. So it’s got to be different stuff. So there’s two questions. So I want to make it really simple. There’s so much noise. If you guys could highlight one thing that somebody should do and in the doing of that one thing, it would bring them closer to personal and financial success. And then the second question again for each of you is, what’s one thing that we hear about that we worry about, that the social soup keeps serving up to us that we should just ignore, forget about, let go, uh, of not concern ourselves with it tells us we should be worried, we shouldn’t worry about it. So inaction is something we can do and then something we can ignore. Jamie, you go first.

Jamie: Invest time thinking. Imagine creating space in your life, 30 minutes, where you can think. 30 minutes a week, and just take time. You shut off all distractions, turn on the timer on your phone, and think about the life that you want to live. What would it be? Time and money aren’t an option. What do you love to do? What inspired you? And just think. And then in that, you’re going to get really connected to the feeling the answers are within. In thinking. I realize for me, I’m, uh, allowing intuition to come through me. Ideas start to flow. I solve problems by thinking. I go in different directions by thinking. I get ideas by thinking. So I think the one thing I would recommend for everybody is starting 30 minutes a week, creating thinking time and call it thinking time.

Jonathan DeYoe: Love it. Uh, Jacklyn what’s your one thing your to do?

Jacklyn: My to do would be with that thinking time that Jamie’s talking about. My thing coming out of that is really getting super crystal clear on who you want to be in this process and setting standards for yourself. That would be the one thing that’s changed everything for me was learning what I’m willing to put up with, what my standards are for myself, and also for the people I allow around me.

Jonathan DeYoe: Love the way you phrased allow around me. And you don’t have to give everyone access to your space. That’s true. That’s excellent.

Jacklyn: And that was a big component of it. It’s really learning. And, of course, family is a perfect example that you can’t always protect, but it is protecting in a sense. Not that, but just, I’m sure that’s for everybody. Everybody has someone that comes to mind when we say that. Right? So I really had to learn, like, how can I protect my energy and situation so that I’m still showing up as who I want to be regardless of who’s around.

Jonathan DeYoe: Right. All right, Jamie, what’s one thing that we hear about that we worry about, that, uh, we think about that we just would be better off letting go.

Jamie: What comes to my mind right now is abundance. There seems to be a lot of scarcity thinking in the world, a lot of fear and understanding the law of polarity. There’s opposites to everything. It’s what we focus on. So if we can take time and focus on all the good, all the great things we’ve done. Every day I start off every coaching call, tell me something good. The first thing I want to do is create this habit where we’re focused and thinking about good things in our life, and that leads to abundance, it leads to gratitude. Focusing on the, uh, abundance side of life versus the scarcity and the lack. And again, it’s a decision. We just have to change our perspective around what’s going on. It changes life. It changes decisions, it changes direction. And having the courage then to pursue that blind faith sometimes. But when we have faith in ourselves, we understand that the journey is just moving in this direction, and we’re all going to figure it out. Like, I’m 58, and I remember my guidance counselor. God, I haven’t thought about this in years, Jonathan. I, um, remember at 17 years old, trying to pick a university and just paralyzed with fear. And, uh, I booked an appointment with a guidance counselor. We went in there, and he sat down and he said, jamie, you’re going to figure it out. And that was the end of my meeting. And I walked out of there thinking, what a waste of time. But he was right. There’s so much wisdom in that.

Jonathan DeYoe: It’s all going to be so just in the context of, uh, something you can let go, it sounds like the thing to let go of. There is the specific thoughts around, I’m not enough. Scarcity. It’s not going to be enough. I can’t figure this out. Just like a coach does. You’re putting a positive spin on it, which I appreciate, but I really want to say, what are those things that we can just let go of? And it sounds like that scarcity mindset is the thing to let go of.

Jamie: Yeah, thanks for pointing that out. I do get in my space, and I just see that in everything and every. But I think, yeah, just letting go, like cutting off the distractions, like the news, like the tv, the papers, that’s not serving us, in my opinion. We need to stop that and just shut it off and let go of that stuff, because that’s keeping us stuck and start there and then go to thinking time, and then it just takes you down a different direction.

Jonathan DeYoe: Dracon, what do you think we should let go of?

Jacklyn: I would say it’s the obsession with being busy and just operating space of like, I need to be productive at all times. And I used to do that, and I used to qualify how good or strong I was as a person based on that. And I think it’s the opposite. It’s like, how am I living presently today? Not how busy am I? You think about that and ask, ah, someone how they’re doing. And that’s such a common answer for people. And I think reframing that to, like, how are you actually doing? I don’t really care what your to do list is. It’s a conversation. But just letting that busyness go and being really wear, ah.

Jonathan DeYoe: And I don’t know if this is as true in Canada as is in the United States, but wear our busyness as a badge of honor. Like, it’s important. And you know this of my own history, but I lost my brother June of last year, one year ago, and my learning from that is all. The busyness is just stupid. It’s just dumb. Life is too short. It goes away. It flies so quickly, and it disappears when you don’t expect it. And accidents happen. Shit in the world goes wrong. What are you doing today right now? And how are you being today right now? And I love the beat you have, because I think that fits right into how the world actually works. Thank you for that. Just before we wrap up, I’d like to get personal again. So, Jamie, this first one’s for you.

Jamie: Okay.

Jonathan DeYoe: What was the last thing you changed your mind about?

Jamie: Great question. What’s possible? What’s possible for our business on a global scale? So I think I was very. When I transitioned this into what I started off doing before I saw Jacklyn in this with me, it was semi retirement, a couple days a week. I’m, um, good cash flow from other things. I’m good. It was just to keep me busy and away from doing what I’m doing. And then we start this journey and realize that, uh, this is bigger than just us. I think that’s what I’ve learned over the last three years, is the message is so much bigger than us. And now I’m bought in, and I’ve been holding back a little bit. Holding back because of, uh, where I think I was or what I wanted. And now realizing that time is of the essence. I heard you share on a podcast about your brother, and, you know, what we have today, and when my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer last year, it doesn’t matter what plan you have. It changes. It changes everything. And in that moment of, uh, time, I think the realization that we have today, we hope we have tomorrow. And just knowing that, okay, I’ve got to live my life to the best of my ability and just follow my dream. If I don’t start today, what am I going to do? It. And I’m not going to live with regrets. Um, I can’t do that.

Jonathan DeYoe: Jacklyn is there anything that people don’t know about you or maybe you’ve told them and they forgot, but something that’s really important to you that they remember and know about you?

Jacklyn: That is a good question, I think. I was really hesitant to share that. I am coaching, actually, for a very long time with the space that I was in. I wasn’t with our clients interesting enough anyone knew. I was very confident and comfortable with, but I really struggled with identifying and changing that identity for myself, and it was just a self image thing that I really needed to work through. But I separated that from my friendships a lot. And this year specifically, I’ve either shortened that gap or I’ve just been really open and honest about how I, like Jamie was saying, really want to serve and help other people. And it’s not about my own insecurities or anything like just, you know, if you have something to share and it can help someone else, why not do that?

Jonathan DeYoe: Beautiful. So let us know how people can connect with you. It sounds like you guys are operating on a global know out of Canada and the US. At least we know one hemisphere covered. How do people find you? Connect with you? What’s your website?

Jacklyn: Yes, everything’s online now, which is amazing. So it really is global social media wise. We’re on Instagram, LinkedIn, TikTok, YouTube at ah Beduhavement and our website’s beduhabmovement.com. We do do a self discovery quiz there too. So stepping into who you want to be begins with understanding where you’re at and who you are right now. So that quiz helps figure that out as well.

Jonathan DeYoe: Very cool, Jamie, Jacklyn thanks very much for coming on. We’ll make sure all those things are in the show notes and to our listeners, I hope you get a lot out of this conversation. Thank you.

Jamie: Thank you, Jonathan.

Jacklyn: Thank you. It’s been amazing.